wat is FAMILY ?
i dun have tat in my whole life
my mother passed awae when i was 5
my grandma took care of me till i was bout 12
i love her alot and she is the only one i love in my family
she stays in malaysia and only come back to Singapore for few weeks during school holidaes
i noe she wanted to see me
and i wanted to see her
but
i dun realli wan her to come here
into this scary house of mine
everytym she cum
my bro will start screaming at her and they will be quarreling from dae to nite
i am so irritated by it
y mux my idiot bro scold my dearest grandma
tats wat make me hate him even more
he is an bastard
an evil old virgin man
todae--sumting happen
when my bro is back at 5plus evening
he realise tat my grandma packed all his stuff
and noe tat sum of his mag is being throw awae
he is frustrated and start shouting and screaming again
and me
have to like being brought into the fight
telling lies tat all the tings throw awae is mine
and my bro was like asking me wher is this and tat
and who is this and tat
i am damn frustrated
and my grandma was like crying
and she went back in the room
i duno how to console her
its was heart aching to see her cry
i dun wan to feel miserable cuming here
i duno wat to do
i cried too
but i tink no one noe
as i was lying on my bed
my bro shout and scream didnt stop even he sees my grandma crying
he jus sae she deserves it
i was feeling damn irritated
i scolded and scream back
and yet
my useless father
sitting in the living room
didnt even sae a single tin to stop my bro
wat the hell
i cant take it anymore
although i dun bear to leave her alone in the house
and i duno when my bro will stop his rubbish
i decided to go out and leave the house
before i go out
my father stil sae sumting to irritate me
and i can only sae
he care more about my crazy neighbour than us
i was feeling helpless and lonely
i have no one left in the family for me
i was alone and hav no wher to go
i hav no frens tat i can tell the story wit
i hav no shoulders for me to cry on
i was crying when i was on the wae to bus stop
and ya
i have no idea wher to go
the oni place i can go is mediacorp
and the oni person i tink of is U
but aft i call u
the more i feel like crying
i duno y
i hate my family
i hate myself
i hate everyone
i have no one
i am so helpless
wat shld i do
i hate goin home
i dun wan to face the people in this somehow fake house
i realli hope for more love and care
plssssssssssssssssssssssss
can sumone save me

i am realli realli sad

the sadness from the heart

sk